MY BLOGS

A Harvard psychologist, Dr Ellen Langer said, “If something is presented as an accepted truth, alternative ways of thinking do not even come up for consideration…”

Last week I talked about how our lives are being shaped by our labels.

We, as pain sufferers, become the physical diagnosis that was given to us, because there must be a physical reason for our pain. We are diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, CRPS (Complex Regional Pain Syndrome, TMS (Tension Myositis Syndrome), CFS (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome), Allodynia, Auto-Immune-disease-with-no-name, and the list goes on. The different labels represent a categorization of a group of symptoms from which PAIN is the worst. Most of the time we suffer from more than one of the above-mentioned illnesses .

What do we do with our Pain Labels? It is helpful or

What labels are you hanging on to?

The medical professionals devise new names for our never-ending pain. We eagerly and gratefully accept the diagnosis of pain as a sickness. It brings comfort and hope because it affirms that we are actually sick. But, finding out that the pain is a life sentence is overwhelming.

Is pain a sickness? Pain is a symptom of a sickness. It’s the body’s warning system of an imbalance or a sickness. But after we have gone through all possible tests, nothing is structurally wrong with us except for this chronic pain. A pain syndrome is closer to the truth because there are many conditions associated with pain.

Have you ever explored the possibility that the pain could originate from an emotional source? Especially if all structural causes have been ruled out by a Pain Management Specialist? Do you realize that suffering from emotional hurts, stress and mental issues can emerge as physical pain?

When a family member was brave and loving enough to ask the hard question of, “Have you considered emotional issues to be the source?” I was fast to respond that I was quite sure there were no emotional issues that could even be a source. I had a happy childhood and I felt there was nothing presently affecting my emotions in a big way . No, to even think that my emotions could possibly be a cause for my pain was off-limits. I was scared out of my wits to be labeled as a hypochondriac or psychosomatic without even getting into any possible mention of mental illness.

At the time I was confronted with the question about my emotional status, my life was spiraling downhill into disability. I needed assistance sitting in/standing up from a chair, getting dressed in the mornings, and getting in and out of a car. On the days the chronic fatigue eased I could manage a shuffle with my cane. My close family took over my daily chores of cooking, cleaning, and laundry.

The question hid hard. How was my emotional status? If someone I love dearly dared to ask the hard question, maybe it was time to rethink. Was I too scared to really face my emotional issues? And then the disturbing realization that I was content with my pain… Or not really with the pain but the end result of it—was I comfortable not having to cope with the boring daily routine of cooking, cleaning, or facing the challenging reality of my emotional scars? Pain was an escape route. When life got too hard, pain was a good excuse to pull away from others and refuse to face the real issue.

Today, I ask you the hard question-−could there be an emotional reason for your pain? Or is it more comfortable to hold onto the labels of pain?

Maybe you’ve already tried the angle of “I am strong. I can cope. I will try harder and shoulder through the pain and it will go away.” I have been there too. But it didn’t work.

Or you believe that growing old brings pain and this is just the way life is. Is that even true?

Then, you settle in consulting yet another physician, because the current one does not understand your pain or insists that there are no structural issues with your body. Someone must know the physical issues you are suffering from. If they diagnose you with a physical issue, then you think you will (someday) be fine.

The problem is, if you keep on searching, you will eventually find a physician/specialist willing to diagnose you and prescribe a drug, but it will only help for a time and then it won’t help anymore because you still haven’t found the true source of your pain. Or a surgical procedure will solve the issue, but then after a year to two, pain will surface in another area of your body. And so, history continues to repeat itself.

Being forever in pain raises your fear and anxiety levels. You believe weather patterns induce your pain. You try to avoid crowded places because the loud noises are overwhelming.

Pain keeps people at a distance. You don’t open your heart for good and loving relationships, because what if they find out who you really are! You’re unable to keep appointments because pain is unpredictable. You become isolated and depression sets in. I have been there too.

Before you know it, life spirals out of control.

Labels keep us from reaching our full potential, growing emotionally, and living life to the fullest. We miss the peace in everyday moments. Emotional healing is key to personal transformation.

Let go of the labels holding you back. Dare to pause for a moment and consider if your pain could be from underlying emotional issues and step out in faith.

Being disabled, suffering from all-consuming chronic pain and depression, foreseeing a future life addicted to drugs and filled with painful surgeries and unable to enjoy the rest of my life with family and friends shocked me into reality. Is that really what I want in life? Just because I hold onto the label of pain as a sickness and am too scared to look at my emotional scars?

Or am I going to believe what Jesus said in John 10:10, “…My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life”? And the Apostle Paul said in Ephesians 2:10, “For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.”

At that low point of my life I had already lost everything in life−my mobility, my joy, my dreams, and my friends. Facing hopelessness, I had a choice−hold onto God’s promises for my life or let the labels continue to destroy me. With Him at my side I chose not to be defined by the label of my pain sickness but, even through my fear, to step out in faith for better health and a future. It was worth it.

I believe that I was created in Jesus Christ for good works! And I believe that you too are God’s masterpiece created for good works to live life abundantly. Hold fast onto the truth that propels you forward to become who Christ called you to be, and shed the labels holding you back.

What about you? What more do you have to lose to step out in faith for a better health and a future? Leave a comment.

Until next time!

Anita Beukman

Your Hope Coach