It’s that time of the year again, time to reflect on the past and ponder the future.

In 2018, for the first time in five years I had no health challenges – no acute or chronic pain. My two major fractures (shoulder and hip) from a fall accident late in 2017 healed completely and currently there is not even an inkling of any pain in these areas. I am grateful to God.

In the beginning of 2017 I was well on my way to functioning without any pain. As I reflected in an email to my physician on August 31, 2017: “Within a period of three months I have climbed two SoCal mountains (Cucamonga Peak and Mt Wilson) and run two 10 k races (not as fast as before but I am getting there). I am also once again enjoying my weekly round of golf, now walking all 18 holes and after 30 years I have even gotten back on the tennis court.”

Five days after sending that email I was hospitalized with a fractured shoulder and hip following a terrible fall at work (both fractures on the right side and I am right handed). However, while my fractures healed quickly (all glory to God) and I set about 2018 full of hope to be healthy and without pain, the new year would hold challenges of its own.

Hubby and I left behind our comfortable familiar environment of the past 10 years and moved to another city and a different community where we embarked on our home renovation journey. Some of the work we contracted out, but most was on the “do-it-yourself” list e.g. replacing doors, sanding down door frames, painting, tiling, etc.

Renovation is hard physical work under the best of circumstances, especially when compounded by the stress of pouring over multiple choices of paint colors, flooring options, wall tiles, faucets, etc. Our bodies and minds were further aggravated by our differing interior decorating ideas and fueled by impending deadlines, inspections, orders not delivered on time - the list goes on. As stress impacts relationships Hubby and I had to navigate some stormy seas …. but we made it through.

Fears can run rampant in these difficult and challenging seasons of life, requiring extra effort to breathe deeply and stay in the moment and not be distracted by worrying about future problems. Staying focused on the bigger picture and remembering what we were trying to accomplish was more important than any fears. I had to remind myself that Hubby loves me and would not deliberately hurt me. I needed to let go of the perfect picture of the finished product that I held in my mind and embrace with grace one more good-memories-experience while enjoying our health and camaraderie.

The move and renovation all started barely 6 months after my surgery when I was not fully flexible or mobile and while I was still struggling with the emotional shock of how quickly life can change. Looking back, I know God’s timing in all of this was perfect, as it always is. As a result of all the busy-ness and physical exercise my daily life was fast-tracked back to normal once again. Toward the end of 2018 I could function with endurance while striving to get my strength back in all areas of my life.

Now, as 2019 stretches out in front of us, we face new challenges. How will we run this race? What is our strategy? How will be walk through this life, grow spiritually, fulfill our goals and face the hardships when they come our way?

The uncertainty scares me, and my fears force me to try and take control. But then I remember that the only control I have are my choices in this moment. Every choice matters and has its ramifications some of which we will only understand in eternity. What about my attitude; do I stay in the moment and enjoy the gifts of life and love or do I live in fear of the future? Do I fret or trust God, worry or pray, give or take, or believe the truth or lies? How do I sacrifice my time - do I invest it wisely or spend it foolishly?

Whatever I choose to sow in this moment I will reap in another season. This moment becomes an hour, hours become a day, days become the months that flow into the years that comprise a lifetime of choices.

I am choosing to be grateful, to give and forgive, to be patient, to smile, to be kind, humble and gentle, and to love and live in faith while trusting God’s timing and promises for this moment, the next, and for a lifetime.

What do you choose in this moment? What do you choose for your life in 2019?

Playlist: Reckless Love – Cory Asbury

** Numbers 6: 24 – 26