MY BLOGS

Today we'll look at emotional injuries and the influence on our bodies. What are Emotional Injuries? How do you cope with Emotional hurts and hang-ups?

When my counselor challenged me to become more aware of my emotions, I had no idea what she was talking about. I knew anger and being aggressive, but I was numb to the rest of the emotional spectrum.

Do you know what emotions are? The Wheel of Emotions was a good starting point to help me understand what kind of feelings and emotions I am dealing with.

How does emotions fit into our lives?

In ancient scriptures (Luke 10:27) Jesus advises us to love with all four aspects of our human being-all your heart, all your soul, all your strength, and all your mind. We are holistic human beings with a soul (spiritual aspect), heart (seat of our feelings, emotions, values, and the core of who we are), mind (how our brain processes thoughts and emotions) and a physical body. All four these components are deeply intertwined.

In Part 2 of Pain Management Plan I discussed on how our thoughts influence our actions. Additionally, research has proven that our thoughts also influence our emotions. Our emotions affect our immune system and thus our health. Positive Emotional factors e.g. gratefulness and happiness strengthen our immune system to fight illnesses. Negative emotions and high stress levels reduce the efficiency of our immune system.

What are Emotional Injuries?

Research has proven that positive and negative childhood experiences are stored in our brain. The consequential psychological patterns affect our current thoughts, feelings, and behaviors as an adult.

Sometimes we've been hurt or wronged knowingly or unknowingly, deliberately of in-deliberately by our loved ones. We have been failed by the ones we experienced as safe, loving, caring, compassionate, trustworthy, and always there for us.

We meet fears, anxiety, self-doubt when a parent promised to be there and didn't show up. We experience rejection and develop trust issues because of a parent leaving the marriage relationship. We suffer from feelings of inadequacy.

We battle miscommunications and stressful relationships. We struggle setting boundaries in our space and time, and other resources. Guilt heaps up when we say no because we don't want to hurt others' feelings. We fear abandonment or being seen as selfish or unspiritual.

Anger from infancy and childhood, internal conflicts, or feeling trapped in intricate situations together with unresolved stress in our daily activities add more fuel to the emotional fire.

Our hurts become hang-ups and contribute to feelings of powerlessness and being vulnerable. Our frustration results in anger.

We consciously suppress (force unwanted information out of our awareness) or unconsciously repress (unconsciously forgetting/blocking unpleasant thoughts, feelings, or events) these emotions. Repressing emotions is a coping mechanism developed by our brains to keep disturbing or threating thoughts about our past emotional injuries out of our conscious awareness.

But our bodies keep score, and this cropped up emotions manifest in pain or stress related illnesses.

How do we cope with our hurts and hang-ups? How do we manage our Emotional Health?

1. Recognize and accept the fact that regularly suppressed emotions with the intention to deal later with the emotion, is an unhealthy practice.

2. Learn to identify your emotions and attend to the emotion as it happens. When emotionally disturbed or distracted, stop. Identify the emotion, breathe, think through it and attend to it. Let it flow through you.

3. Journal about your emotions and feelings for ten to fifteen minutes per day, starting with two to three times per week and increase to a daily exercise. If you haven't journaled before start with one question: What is going on in your life right now? Write down everything that crosses your mind and all the emotions you feel about each event.

Or journal before you start your day. Write from a place of gratitude. Research has proved that gratitude improves our emotional well-being as well as our physical health. Dr. Benjamin Hardy, an organizational psychologist says, “Praying about, meditating on, and then writing what you're grateful for at the beginning of your journaling session immediately shifts your emotional and physical state, as well as your perspective.”

4. Pour out your emotions and pain to God in prayer as we learn from King David in ancient scriptures. Psalm 38: 3 – 8 describes King David's lament “…my whole body is sick; my health is broken…; my guilt overwhelms me−it is a burden too heavy to bear. I am bent over and racked with pain. All day long I walk around filled with grief. A raging fever burns within me, and my health is broken. I am exhausted and completely crushed. My groans come from an anguished heart.” He continues in verse 17 “I am on the verge of collapse facing constant pain.” Friends, God hears us. He loves when we trust him and tell him the truth. Pour out your heart to him.

5. Consult a Pain Management Therapist to guide you through a healing path. The Chronic Pain Therapists have personal experience with Chronic pain and are specialists in working with Chronic pain sufferers.

Thank you for your time today. I would love to hear your thoughts on how your pain levels are influenced by stress, emotions, and relationship issues. Which of the above strategies have you implemented and how is it working for you? Contact me.

Next week we finish our Pain Management Plan with Spiritual Growth and Soul Care.

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Stay strong dear friend.

Anita Beukman

Your Hope Coach.